And we're back! Let's welcome Socratic NASCAR's new contributor Mayor Jimmy, a veteran of way more racing-related blogging than me.
I
had this idea back when Jr had the Dark Knight Rises paint scheme, but then he
won and I got distracted. If Dale Jr were a comic book hero, he'd have to be
Batman, right? I mean, losing his father, having to prove himself to be more
than a rich kid, all that? So that got me thinking what other comic book heroes
the other drivers would be. But my knowledge of comic book heroes is basically
from Hollywood, so I'm sure there are subtleties I'm missing. One thing is
certain, though - Tony Stewart IS Wolverine. That can't be up for debate.
So, which comic book heroes would various drivers be? Okay, Mayor Jimmy - GO:
Mayor Jimmy says:
Tony Stewart/Wolverine
This was Sara's "must have" and actually it's a
pretty spot on match. Bad-boy looks, very quick temper, but one other
good comparison Sara didn't even know about. Wolverine is Canadian and
back in the days before he joined the X-men (but before he was Weapon X) he
rolled with Canada's Department H which deployed a Canadian superhero team
Alpha Flight. They pop up on the radar every once in a while. So
does Wolverine's Weapon X days. Still with me?
Okay good. So the reason
this translates to Tony so well, is because Tony also started out somewhere
other than where he is today: Sprint Cars (by which I mean F1). That
too pops up on the radar once in a while in the form of the Indy 500 usually.
Well, Wolverine gained his primary popularity in X-men lore and Tony has
gained his in NASCAR. BAM.
Michael Waltrip/Aquaman
This pick was mostly because Waltrip is a king when it comes
to endorsements and plugging sponsors. Seriously, there's nobody better.
Just as Aquaman is King of the sea. Remove Michael from his kingdom
and put him on a track, he's a fish out of water. Sure they both have
occasional moments where they shine, but otherwise Aquaman is taken as
seriously out of water as Michael is outside a commercial.
Dale Jr/Wally West (Flash)
I'm more specific about him being Wally West in that West is
actually the third incarnation of The Flash.
West actually started out as Kid Flash, the sidekick of Barry Allen, who was
Flash since the 50s. Like recent NASCAR fans with Jr as “Earnhardt,” West
is probably who most recent comic fans would know as “The Flash”. I mean
c'mon, all that's missing is Jr to have started his career as “Kid Earnhardt”
right?
I had thought about using Black Panther due to him being someone
born into royalty, had his father die early, tried to separate himself from his
kingdom to forge his own identity (Black Panther joining the Avengers, Jr
leaving DEI), but Black Panther isn't mainstream enough. Sara suggested Batman
due to parental death and trying to shed the rich boy image. Only problem I see
in that one is that Jr's dad dying isn't what made him go into racing; he was
already doing it. Also, Bruce Wayne doesn't shy from his spoiled rich
image. He embraces it to make people realizing he's Batman harder.
Think about it, if I told you Paris Hilton was secretly a crime fighter,
how hard would you laugh? Flash however, he's a big name in comics and
the flash "family" has been around a while.
Jimmie Johnson/Lex Luthor
He's a businessman at the top of his game. He goes into the
boardroom and he gets it done. Johnson gets it done on the track.
Like Luthor closing deals, Johnson wins titles. HOWEVER...... we
know there's a hidden story. We know behind it all, there are backroom
deals. Cheating happens. Publicly, we can't even implicate him in
it. Lex always finds a way out usually by finding others to take the
fall. We all know who Jimmie has to take the fall.
Busch Brothers/Punisher
I wanted to separate them, but honestly, they're both the
same thing. Trouble. Pure, unapologetic, trouble. They have their
missions, they don't care who they cheese off in pursuit of the goal.
Everyone knows they're trouble. During the Marvel event known as Civil
War (which totally sucked – It was comic book pretentiousness at its
highest) Captain America got desperate and recruited the Punisher. He was
also about to make a deal with a couple minor super-villians when Punisher
walked in and gunned them down. Cap knocked Punisher around as Punisher
told him “you lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas.” Same thing goes
for all these sponsors who try and act shocked when one of these yahoos opens
his mouth and embarrasses them.
...
More drivers/heroes to come. For now, what do you think?
